The one thing that all parents, well almost all, would agree with, is that arguing with your teenage kid is one of the most daunting of all jobs you do as a parent. And if you are a sports parent, you are already dealing with busy schedules, keeping up with practice games, living up to the expenses, and then there’s dealing with tantrums.
Sports kids, at times, tend to get a little more argumentative as compared to kids in general, because they deal with an added commitment, which creates added stress at some level. If, as a parent you have been worrying about your kid’s attitude because most of your arguments escalate into high-drama family squabbles, or you are sick because your kid just walks out on you every time you try and engage in a conversation (more of an argument of sorts), you need to calm down for a moment and think logically. There are smarter (and wiser) ways of handling conflicts and arguments with your kid. Just go through the list to help you deal with it better.
- Never start your argument at a high pitched voice. The kid will automatically get in a defensive mode and will just focus on counter argument. If you want the kid to reasonably understand your point of view, you need to logically present your argument.
- Accept, acknowledge and understand. If you have a lot going on and you are stressed, so is the kid. Kids have a world of their own. They have their share of problems which can be too much to deal with for a kid. Do not underestimate their situation. Also, what you see as attitude problem may, in all chances, be a stress outburst. Reason out things, try and understand their situation, this will prevent half your fights.
- Children often think parents are being unreasonable or unfair. So if your kid is not agreeing to a certain point, tell them the frank reason why you are being strict or maybe taking your stand. There’s a fair chance the child will understand. If she doesn’t, she’ll know she needs to have a better reason for it, throwing tantrums will not work.
- If the kid refuses to listen in spite of your efforts to make her understand, do not give in because you want to avoid an argument. Be assertive, stand up for the right thing. This will give your child a message that you will not give in to unreasonable demands and will teach her to stand for the right thing, even if it is a tough stand to take.
- Always end an argument in resolution. Even if it means finding a mid-way between your and the kid’s point of view. An unresolved argument will leave sourness that can be the root cause of spiteful relationships.
Need a few tips to keep up at the sports parenting challenge? Read http://blog.instateam.net/2015/05/tips-for-sports-parents.html