Children today face a lot of competition, especially in sports. Given the immense pressure and stress kids are exposed to, it is just natural for them to fall out or drift away.
Many parents often tell us how their children want to quit their sports training, sports club or the school team. More often than not there are weird reasons told by kids to their parents for leaving. And any attempt to motivate the child often lands as putting pressure which further worsens things. So how should parents handle a situation like this? If letting the kid quit is not a good option, making the child continue is not a great choice either because when the kid is already worked up, there is no point adding to the pressure.
It is indeed a difficult situation and needs a lot of patience and discretion while dealing with it. A good place to start would be understanding the pain area. Take a walk in the park, play a game, spend some casual fun time with your child. When the child is relaxed, she is more likely to open up. That would perhaps be the right time to discuss the problem.
Here are a few tips to help you through the counselling session with your kid:
- Listen carefully and patiently. Do not interrupt while the kid is talking it out. Start speaking only when the kid is done talking.
- Do not let your maturity judge the situation. The problem might be small for you but from the child’s perspective it might be massive.
- Acknowledge the pain. Do not belittle the child by saying it is a silly problem.
When the child has talked it out, presenting the kid a solution to the problem might sound like the best option. However natural the instinct is, you should resist it. Do not imply a solution you think is best. Give options of possible solutions. Discuss pro and cons of each situation, tell which option you fell is the best solution and why, and based on reasoning, let the child pick her option. Whether the solution works out or not, either ways it will be a great leaning experience for the kid. And in the long run this one learning will become an integral part of the adult your kid grows up into.
Have you handled a similar situation? Please share your experience with us in the comments below.
But at the same time there are certain techniques that coaches would ideally pass on to their teams that can be termed as the crux of their experience, the game techniques that make a team win. How ethical these techniques are or not, is a call parents and coaches would need to take together. The question is how much are you willing to compromise for your child’s victory in a game? Parents would have to take their own call. After all your child’s future is at stake.